Why It's Important to be Single in College

October 17, 2018


     So you have a high school sweetheart, and that's great.
     You're going to the same college or colleges near each other, or even colleges clear across the country, and you're going to do all in your power to make it work.
     I'm not here to tell you to break up with him or her, but if you came to this article looking to see if you should, or if you've been wondering if you should break up, it's probably time to call it quits at least for the time being.
     Maybe it has been years and he or she is all you know and it scares you not be with that person, but I promise you, everyone needs to be single.
     I am here speaking from personal experience because I had a boyfriend for a year my junior year of high school, then quickly jumped into another relationship which lasted for almost two years. That relationship will always hold a place in my heart because it was my first real love and he was my best friend, but strangely, despite those things I'm not sad.
     Don't get me wrong, that first day that I ended it I sobbed for hours until I forced myself to go outside and study. But then I just felt so much lighter, so much freer. I wondered if that was how everyone else who was single came to college feeling.
     I had been with him my senior year of high school and my freshman year of college, and then into the start of my sophomore year, and we even went to the same school so we were always together. However, after I ended it, I just couldn't help but feel like that was that sense of freedom that came with going away to school. I was finally on my own with my own life.
     It was enlightening, without sounding hysterically cheesy.
     So if you are in my boat, and are wondering if you should end it, just do it. It will hurt both of you, but it will either let you know it's time to move on or that you really, truly want to be together. If you tried to live your own life and you want him or her there by your side through the rest of it, give it another chance.
     It will not be the end of the world.
     Some people come into your life for a reason, but aren't meant to stay forever.
     
     So now that I got my personal message out of the way, I wanted to tell you all why it's important to be single in college if you still aren't convinced and are trying desperately to find someone or stay with someone.

You need to develop yourself before you develop into someone else
     It can be disturbingly easy to fall into someone else's routine and not create one for yourself. College is a time for you to find your people, but if you're only seeing your partner's friends, you're not finding your people.
     It's also the time to find your hobbies and try different clubs. Sometimes you can feel embarrassed about wanting to try something if you have a partner, or they could make a remark about it that makes you not try it. Try it. Whatever it is, try it. Whether it's acapella, or creative writing, or water polo, try it if it interests you.
     Not to mention, it's the time to create a brand of yourself for future employers. That is something very important to build up and you'll need clubs and internships and such for your resume and portfolio so don't be held back from anything.

Make sure he or she is really what you want -- never settle
     There are tons of fish in the sea to put it bluntly. You never know who is out there and college is a good time to test the waters and see what you actually like or don't like. 
     If there is the slightest thought that there might be someone out there better for you in your mind, you're probably right.


The freedom is other worldly
     I'm not exaggerating. I went a little crazy the first few weeks after we broke up, and honestly tomorrow is one month since and I'm still going crazy. I realized that the days are actually so long and there are so many ways to fill them, and that so much can be done during the day. You don't have to live by anyone else's schedule, your day is entirely your own.

     In essence,

BrEaK uP wItH hIm

     There are exceptions, and you may know in your soul that your partner is the one, but I'm just saying that it is good to be alone and it is good to experiment with your life while you're young.
     Hopefully this was a good push in either direction, for you to know either you need to stay with him or her or let him or her go.
     This is your time for yourself whether someone is by your side or not.

Thanks for reading,
     Taylor . x




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